Red Moon

There was a total lunar eclipse here this evening in Cambodia (and across much of this part of the world.). The sky over Phnom Penh was clear and the eclipse readily apparent.

I was busy this evening and didn’t think I’d have the opportunity to see it, but carried my camera just in case. I stepped outside at about 9:35PM. The eclipse seemed just a bit lopsided, one side of the moon slightly darker than the other. The whole surface was in deep shadow and distinctly pinkish red with a touch of orange.

I aimed my camera skyward and took a couple of snaps. I noticed the Vietnamese woman standing near me, staring at me. I pointed up and said, “eclipse of the moon, shadow on the moon.”

She said, “I know, no good.”

I smiled and said (admittedly somewhat insensitively,) “What? Dragon eating the moon or something?”

She snapped back, “You think this is funny?”

I said nothing.

“Bad luck,” she said. “Bad luck, next year the Dragon comes. Bad luck last time this happened. Bad luck this year and next.”

I didn’t smile this time. Just went back to taking photos. She walked away.

The photo above was the best I could do hand-held. Taken at about 9:52PM with a D5100, 18-200mm lens, f5, 1/30, ISO 6400.

According to the Phuket News:

...the entire eclipse should be visible from Asia and Australia. However, North America and Canada will witness only the start of totality as the moon dips below the horizon.

The partial eclipse begins at 7:45pm when the Moon reaches the umbra, Earth’s inner dark shadow. Totality will be achieved by by 9:06pm as the entire Moon is covered by the Earth’s shadow.

The eclipse will reach its zenith at 9:31pm, with the Moon starting to move out of shadow at 9:57pm.

The total eclipse will last 51 minutes.

From start to finish, the partial and total eclipse phases will take 3 hours 32 minutes, with the final penumbra ending at 12:30am...

Eclipse location:

From: All About The Total Lunar Eclipse On 10th December, 2011

Pedophile!

It finally happened.

As a result of the hysteria generated by the western press, and perhaps a bit of racism as well, today I was accused of being a pedophile, for absolutely no other reason than being a white male in the company of brown children – my son and daughter. 

First, just a bit about us. I’m 50+ years old, white, a businessman and have lived in Cambodia for more than 18 years. I’m married to an Asian woman. We’ve been together more than 10 years and have two beautiful children - a 9 year old girl and 7 year old boy. We are the natural parents of both. They are wonderful children, the loves of my life. They are well-behaved, excellent students and speak perfectly accented American English as well as 2-3 other languages. And though it sickens me that the situation requires me to make note of their racial features… though they are not distinctly Asian, they are darker than me and not 100% European in appearance, to anybody with an eye, clearly ‘kon kut’ (mixed race.)

I work a lot, perhaps too much, but always reserve Sundays for my family and children. It’s become a Sunday afternoon tradition in our family to give Mom a break, some time for herself. The kids and I always go somewhere together on Sunday afternoons - the Museum, the park, the Palace, the Russian Market, or quite often the riverfront for snacks and CD shopping, as we did today. 

We took a tuk-tuk to the riverfront, got out at K-West (Sisowath Quay and Street 154) and started walking up the riverfront road. My children were dressed in their Sunday best, happy and smiling. We strolled hand in hand, my daughter anxious to buy the newest installment of Harry Potter at the CD shop, my son looking forward to strawberry and passion fruit ice cream at K-West.

We hadn’t got but 40 meters when I noticed a woman – white, 50ish, seemingly a tourist - walking toward us taking photos in our direction. A man, presumably the husband, stood next to her. As we got closer I thought she might be trying to get a riverfront shot, perhaps of something behind me, so I stepped slightly to the side to get out of the way. But she tracked us with her camera. As we got closer and she kept shooting I furrowed my brow in a ‘what are you doing?’ sort of way, but didn’t actually say anything.

She held up her camera, pointed at it and said, “Internet!” I wasn’t sure I got the meaning so I said “what?” She pointed at her camera again and said with a smirk, “Internet,” pointed at me and said, “you pedo!” Hearing clearly but not wanting to make a mistake I stepped closer to her and asked again. She repeated, “Photo you, internet, you pedo…for police,” in a distinctly Italian accent. I said something like “These are my children.” She just shook her head and started to raise her camera again. I said, “You want police? You want to call the police?” She nodded. I said, “I’ll call police.” She nodded again and we stepped to the side of the pavement together. My children backed off a few steps, frightened by the obvious tension in our voices. I pulled out my phone, called my staff and asked them to call the police and I called the police myself as well. I told them where I was and asked them to come quickly.

We stood there uncomfortably for a moment. I considered grabbing the camera, but didn’t want to start a fight, especially with my children there. I motioned my children to us and told my daughter to explain who she was. I figured my daughter’s thick American accent alone should be enough. My daughter started to tell her name, age and such when the Italian woman cut her off. “No English. No English,” she barked. Startled, my children moved behind me.

We stood there another uncomfortable minute, waiting. The woman started to get nervous. She said “I go,” and tried to push past me. I said “No, we wait for police.” She repeated that she was going. I told her to either wait for the police or delete the photos. She said, “No, you pedo,” and tried to push past me again. I stood firm and told her we were going to wait for the police. She pushed me back but I stayed in front of her like a blocker. I didn’t touch her myself because she was a woman, but she pushed me back repeatedly. It became a jostling and yelling match, her pushing, me blocking, staggering down the riverfront back toward K-West. Khmers and tourists stood and stared at the commotion. I just kept repeating, “wait for the police or delete the photos,” as did she, “no, no…go, go.” 

Through all this her husband did nothing to help her. I kept expecting him to jump in. Rather hoping he would actually.  But he just looked uncomfortable, slowly, silently, wimpishly following behind his wife.

In front of K-West they jumped in a tuk-tuk. I thought about getting in too. Or perhaps grabbing a motodup. I saw my children standing about 15 meters away, wide-eyed. I didn’t want to involve them in a chase. This was already too much. I pulled out my phone and aimed it at the woman to take a photo. She screamed, “No photo! No photo!” and covered her face. It took a few seconds for my camera to work allowing her time to cover. I took several photos, all of her with face covered.

After they left, I called the police back and told them she was gone and to not bother coming.

My kids and I went into K-West, got some tea and sodas and we talked about what had happened. I tried to explain, leaving out the bit about pedophilia and replacing it with ‘she thought I was trying to steal you.’ “Why?” they asked. I could only say because I’m white and they look Asian. “But we’re a family,” they said. They know that their Mom is Asian and I’m a barang, but they haven’t yet learned that this is an important distinction in the minds of some.

I know there is more to it than that, but how do I explain that to a 7 and 9 year old?

In moments of silence, as they tried to comprehend what this woman had done, I tweeted about it. The whole thing left me rattled. Bitching about it on internet seemed to help relieve the tension a bit.

My daughter made an astute observation in the aftermath. Thirty minutes later, as we walked to the CD shop she said, “She knows nothing about Cambodia. Doesn’t she know that Asians and Americans can have children? She doesn’t know anything.”

I think my daughter is right about that, or perhaps even understated it a bit. The woman doesn’t know anything about Cambodia. She, in fact, probably only imagines she knows something because of what she has read in the western press, which is something less than nothing in many cases.

If this Italian woman isn’t simply a racist, her mind has probably been twisted by the constant stream of sensational, repetitive and often wildly-overstated stories of western pedophiles and abused children in Cambodia.  And not only by the western press but by NGOs that profit from it and feed the beast with exaggerated stats and a constant stream of rehashed horrors stories that keep the funds flowing and the presses humming.

Back in the US a few months ago I saw MSNBC playing their 8 year old ‘Children for Sale’ video yet again, about a brothel village that hasn’t existed in more than half a decade. Some NGOs are still pawning off the ’33,000 child prostitutes in Cambodia’ stat when there aren’t 33,000 prostitutes of any age in Cambodia (link). Some Christian NGOs tell their people that there are women chained to beds and being raped in hostess bars in the center of the tourist district on the Phnom Penh riverfront. Every westerner busted for pedophilia in Cambodia is repeated in the international press for weeks while the fact that they make up a tiny fraction of the pedos in Cambodia goes unmentioned. Nicholas Kristof parachutes into Cambodia to do a sensational live-tweet of a brothel raid, painting himself the cowboy hero riding to the rescue of women and children in the Wild West (link1 link 2). Some NGOs in Cambodia parade their rescued victims (link) of trafficking in front of an insatiable press and voyeuristic tourists to repeat their stories of victimhood again and again - donations accepted. Sex in Cambodia sells. 

Don’t get me wrong. Human trafficking and trafficking in children for sex is a real and present problem in Cambodia, and the rest of the world. There are pedophiles, especially amongst the Khmer and Asians, and certainly westerners too. It all needs to be addressed, there is no doubt about that. But the western press’s manic fixation on abusive sex in Cambodia has made the country name synonymous with pedophilia, unfairly and inaccurately so.

From her exposure to the press, tourists like this Italian woman think that pedophiles are as common as cockroaches, that any white man with an Asian looking child must be a pedo who can simply waltz through tourist areas in broad daylight with a prepubescent child on each hand. (And I can’t help but believe that if my children had been white, she wouldn’t have made this judgment about us.) Kristof’s sensationalism has 3-day tourists believing they too can play super-hero, identifying pedos at a glance, swooping to the rescue and saving a child in between their afternoon visit to the Royal Palace and authentic Cambodian Curry dinner on the riverfront.

Ultimately, as good as their intentions might be, as important as the problem is, the press, some NGOs and these misguided tourists are doing the country, the victims of trafficking, and yes, even little people like me a terrible disservice, while enriching and glorifying themselves in the process. This needs to stop. This isn’t a game or an action hero movie or an opportunity for tourists to feel righteous pity. The problems need to be addressed realistically and not in the context of sensationalism, mania, big-money, and dare I say, racism.

If, unlike this Italian woman, you have a reasonable, rational belief that you have seen a child in a risk situation, by all means, call the ChildSafe helpline, if possible keep the child in sight and wait until the ChildSafe team arrives to sort things out.

Anyway, I figure that when my photo turns up on some Italian website as another pedophile operating openly and with impunity in Cambodia, it will also include a story of my powerful police connections that were on their way to protect me and how she had to flee for her life. A narrow escape by our heroine, just like in the movies. Cambodia is a very dangerous place, you know. And her harrowing tale might even generate a few donations for some Cambodian anti-trafficking NGO.

News from Cambodia

Over the last few of days I’ve spoken with friends who live and work in Vietnam, Thailand, Malaysia and China. A few happen to be in town visiting this week and others through Facebook and such. Amongst beers and pool games and casual banter, we’ve also touched on the Cambodian NGO Law debate and criticisms, and the land-grabbing issue, especially in light of the recent violent confrontation between police and Lake residents caught on video.

Interestingly, at some point in the various conversations, mostly just in passing, each one registered some degree of surprise or awe at the open debate and availability of information in Cambodia. In the case of the NGO law, that there has been extensive public criticism and debate and that the government actually seems to be taking some of it on board. In the case of the Lake confrontation, that local and foreign reporters were present, that it was openly photographed and videoed and that it’s all available on internet in Cambodia. To varying degrees, all of these activities would have been much more restricted, if allowed at all in my friend's various countries of residence. Reflecting this observation, the Reporters without Borders Press Freedom Index ranks Cambodia a moderately weak 128, but still better, in some cases significantly better than all of the surrounding countries - which says something about both Cambodia and her neighbors.

As we spoke, qualifiers such as the introduction of more restrictive laws over the last couple of years, the illusion of freedom amongst self-censorship and the apparent blocking of some websites did not go unnoted. But still, most were struck in one way or another by the fairly sharp contrast between the state of press and internet freedom in Cambodia as compared to their various East Asian homes. In this regard at least, Cambodia is the brightest spot in the dim landscape of Southeast Asian press freedom.

Elephants Suffering

Prey Veng Zoo - 2003

Back in 2003 I visited a small, little known zoo in central Prey Veng province. Most of the cages were empty and the few remaining animals were in terrible shape. At the time I was told that the zoo was slowly shutting down and that most of the animals had been transferred to a new zoo from the same owner, located outside of Kampot town near the Teuk Chhou rapids - a popular destination for local tourists. So a couple of months later I went to check out the new zoo in Kampot – the Toek Chhou Zoo.

At the time the Toek Chhou Zoo didn't look all that bad, at least as Southeast Asian zoos go. By western standards the animals were kept in abysmal little enclosures and treated more as amusements than living creatures, but that is something of the norm at zoos in Southeast Asia. That aside, the animals appeared to be healthy and properly fed, especially as compared to some other zoos in the region. But since then, things have changed considerably. Like the old Prey Veng zoo, the Toek Chhou Zoo has fallen into disrepair and many of the animals are horribly neglected.

The dismal state of the zoo has been well-reported of late. I first read of it on Khmer440 back in early March 2011. Shortly thereafter the Phnom Penh Post picked up the story, doing an in-depth report on the miserable state of the zoo and its charges:

The zoo of horrors
27 March 2011, The Phnom Penh Post

Kampot province’s Teuk Chhou zoo is a place where no one seems to care about how animals are treated, a place where animals are kept in cramped, roofless shelters and rely largely on food from tourists to survive…

It has no roofed-in shelters as the wet season approaches or even any semblance of a natural habitat for the animals as witnessed during a visit over the weekend.

Orangutans and baboons swing restlessly back and forth between the steel bars of their three-metre square enclosures, while eagles and other birds of prey scarcely have enough space to spread their wings, let alone fly – that is if they are one of the lucky few whose wings aren’t badly damaged.

The state of the zoo’s two elephants is heartbreaking, as their emaciated necks stretch through the thick bars of their enclosure in an attempt to eat blades of grass, seemingly one of their few sources of nourishment.

The skeletal bodies of the two animals are hard to ignore and the two have become aggressive, lashing out at visitors who step near their enclosure…

Moved by the report in the Post, particularly by the sad state of the large mammals, many have stepped forward with offers of possible assistance, both financial and expert, as reported in a follow-up by the Post on April 5:

Zoo owner open to NGO help
05 April 2011, The Phnom Penh Post

Last month, The Post gave an in-depth view into the deplorable conditions at the zoo, which is unable, due to an apparent shortage of funding, to provide adequate food and water for the animals.

Offers of help from NGOs, private companies and individuals have since been made.

Nick Marx, wildlife rescue director at the NGO Wildlife Alliance, said yesterday: “I will do whatever I can to ensure the safety of the animals, and to work with Nhim Vanda and any other supporters that want to help financially better the lives of animals at Teuk Chhou zoo.

“Wildlife Alliance has wanted to help for a long time and I’m really happy [to] do whatever is required.”

The zoo has also caught the attention of a member of the Royal Family, Princess Norodom Sita, who was shocked at the treatment of the animals but hopes to raise support for a solution in the near future...

In light of these reports, and with the memory of the sorry conditions of the old Prey Veng zoo still in mind, I decided to go see for myself what was up in Kampot. I visited to the Toek Chhou Zoo a couple of days ago, spending several hours there. It was Khmer New Year and they were doing a moderately brisk business. It wasn’t crowded but there were dozens of people touring the zoo at the same time I was there – all Cambodians, no foreigners that I saw.

I walked the entire place and found it to be a pretty mixed bag. The grounds were quite run down. The kid's rides were in a state of complete disrepair, but most of the statues that adorn the park were bright and freshly painted. Some zoo animals were fairing better than others. Some looked fed, others much less so. The birds appeared fairly well miserable in their tiny cages, as did the great apes and monkeys. The big cats appeared gaunt but still active. The elephants in particular were a truly pitiful sight.

Female and male Asian elephants at Toek Chhou Zoo, Kampot

Water pit

There is a pair of them there - Asian elephants, a male and female. Both are in very rough shape, withered for lack of food and seemingly unhealthy. Bones protruded under their loose skin, especially along their shoulders, neck and back. They seemed lethargic and sad wandering about their barren pen. There was no food or anything to graze in the enclosure, only dirt, dead leaves and feces. A slime covered pool seemed to be the only water source and a small roofed area just big enough to fit the two was their only possible escape from the sun. It was a harsh, empty, desert-like environment for animals meant to live in a green and shaded tropical jungle. To be honest I’ve seen elephants treated worse in Thailand, but that did nothing to reduce the shock of seeing these magnificent animals reduced to such a deplorable state. I am not a zoologist or vet and am not qualified to assess the health of zoo animals, but it seemed fairly well obvious to my untrained eye that these animals weren’t just unhappy and deprived but were and are suffering.

Elephant pen

Apparently I was not alone in my inexpert assessment. As I stood there, a Khmer family wander up to the other side of the pen. They did not look happy with what they saw. The father shook his head in disapproval and I distinctly heard him say “ooooh, skoam, skoam” ('thin, thin.') He quickly led his wife and frowning children away from the sad sight of these anguished animals.

Female elephant stretching for grass to eat

The female elephant continually picked at the well picked over greenery outside the pen, but to no avail. All of the grass was gone, already eaten, leaving only inedible plants and thistle. Disturbed, I went to a nearby drink vendor and asked if there was anywhere I might buy some food for the elephants. First she said "no" but then offered to sell me some of the stock of sugarcane she uses to make drinks for the tourists. I bought about half of it, a full armload of cane which I lugged back to the elephant pen. Apparently I wasn’t the first to do this. When the elephants saw me coming with food they rushed to meet me. I passed them a stalk at a time, trying to distribute it evenly between the two, but the larger, stronger male aggressively stole the female's food. So I gave him a few stalks to keep him busy then lured the other to a different part of the pen to feed her separately. They both ate eagerly.

I hope that was the right thing to do - that it was the right kind of food, etc.

As mentioned above, since the first Post article about the zoo, there has been an outpouring of concern and offers of help from individuals, companies and NGOs, and according to the April 5 Post article (see above,) the zoo owner seems willing to accept assistance. As this is a privately owned zoo in an out-of-the-way place and the help would have to be very long term, I can't imagine how exactly that is going to work. But whatever is to be done, these animals are suffering right now, as I write, and help cannot come too soon for the elephants and the other animals at the zoo.

Female elephant scrounging for grass to eat

2010

It’s the first New Year of the year. Two more to come.

And it’s harvest time in Cambodia.

The monsoons ended a month or so ago. It’s cool and mostly rainless, bringing an end to the primary growing season. Most of the rice has recently been cut and the paddies are dry and turning fallow brown.

Driving through rural Kampong Trach (Kampot province) yesterday I saw several groups threshing rice by hand - the ‘flailing method’ - beating the long stalks against rows of threshing boards and funneling the seed into baskets beneath. Piles of drying rice straw sat stacked in front of houses and bamboo and plastic mats lined the side of the road, covered with new rice seed airing in the sun and breeze. Toward the end of the day, as the sun was setting, women collected the dry seed from the mats into large sacks for storage.

Rural Cambodia is a busy place right now, bustling with harvest work. Not really an ideal time for a New Year holiday. Nevertheless, there will be many celebrations today (Dec 31,) and a certain amount of partying come Chinese New Year in February as well. Cambodians are never ones to pass up on a good holiday, even non-Cambodian ones. But the real New Year here - Khmer New Year (Jol Chhnam Khmei) - is still months away, in April, well after the harvest period has ended and just before the seasonal rains begin, at a time more in sync with the Southeast Asian rhythms of the monsoons and the rice.

Nevertheless, for a westerner like me, today is New Year Eve, my New Year Eve. So, naturally, with three hours to kill driving from Phnom Penh to Kep, I took to reflecting on the year for Cambodia - the news, the big stories, the not so big stories, changes, non-changes, lingering impressions and the state of things. I made a list of whatever came to mind, noting it into my iPhone as I drove. This is that list, with some references added.

* The Preah Vihear border dispute with Thailand was news all year in one form or another – a largely imposed crisis, its current incarnation born of Thailand’s recent internal upheaval. To date, Cambodia has held her own quite well throughout, the Cambodian PM deserving much of the credit for navigating difficult political waters, just bringing the Preah Vihear dispute to a seemingly settled calm... Through there has just been yet another incident spurring yet another crisis. It continues. 

* China is HERE in the most present tense, inking huge deals in aid, investment and development, throwing money at Cambodia like it grows on trees in China. The US (and the west) lost significant ground in Cambodia as China soared in the zero-sum game of aid/investment-bought influence and favor. ‘No-strings’ money from China won hands down over American-style hard bargaining aid-for-improvements approach. Uncle Sam isn't the only deep-pockets sugar daddy on the block anymore.

* Boeung Kak Lake is almost gone.

* The Japanese drainage system project in Phnom Penh that tied up traffic and parks for two years was completed this year, seemingly with no visible effect whatsoever on the drainage. In my non-expert observation, it floods now same as before, maybe worse. I’m no engineer but I can’t help but wonder if the demise of Boeung Kak Lake might have something to do with it.

* A mid-term year, the next national elections still 2 years away, internal politics were a bit slow. The government is stable and functioning, probably more so than any government since UNTAC. The CPP is in firm and sole control, holding the majority necessary to control Parliament. SRP is still percolating along, being provocative, getting accused, threatened with jail and touring the world. FUNCINPEC and friends burped and gurgled a couple of times.

* Mu Sochua of SRP distinguished herself, winning a big-stakes game of chicken with the government, standing her ground when others may have gone to France. Who has the cajones in that party, eh? Keep an eye on this lady. She’s going places.

* Land grabbing and evictions continue unabated.

* A Khmer Rouge guy was convicted. 'Enough is enough' was declared. And send more money.

* Boeung Keng Kang 1 is now the city's preferred hunting ground of midnight muggers.

* Yet another beach in Sihanoukville - Otres Beach - has been partially closed for development. Now, something like two thirds of the main beaches on the peninsula are either closed or suffer limited access. (Don't fret, beach-goers. There's still plenty of beach in Sihanoukville for you - Ochheuteal, part of Victory, part of Otres and Sokha if you can afford it.)

* Most of the islands near Sihanoukville remain completely undeveloped - beautiful, pristine beaches and untouched tropical jungle. But it’s not going to last. Plans are afoot. Experience it while you can. 

* An exclusive gym for the employees of 7NG Land Development Group has been erected on the site of the Dey Krahorm village eviction. All 7NG Group staff will be free to play different kinds of sports: football, tennis, volleyball, etc.

* Siem Reap managed to get even more touristy with Pub Street at ground zero.

* There are now several KFCs in Cambodia (Phnom Penh and Siem Reap) and Pizza Hut and Burger King are on the way.

* Koh Pich.

* Cambodia, long given one-dimensional coverage in the international press, got a little more comic book this year – a land of Villains, Victims and now Heroes.

* The rural countryside remains about the same - picturesque, poor, ignorant and traditional.

* The guy throwing bricks at foreigners on the riverfront seems to have stopped, and it turns out none of it ever happened anyway.

* Cambodia's first viral video, oh my.

* Pity tourism is still en vogue - 'volunteering,' orphanage visits, be-Angelina-for-a-day packages - providing potentially lucrative outlets for those who would exploit children and the disadvantaged. Study up before you do it.

* There seemed to be an abundance of sex industry focused Johnny-come-lately journalists, Christian saviors and new NGOs turning up this year – over-funded, under-informed and 10 years too late.

* On that same note, evangelical Christian groups seem to be arriving at an ever increasing rate, most involved in charitable work of some sort, all of them with an ulterior motive - hunting and collecting souls. However they have chosen to help - education, rescue, shelters, etc - it always come back to exposing people to the Word of the Lord Jesus.

* The real estate bubble that burst a couple of years ago remains burst. The Monument to Pointless Development at the corner of Monivong and Sihanouk has been completed. 

* The tallest building in the Asia was constructed on the riverfront, but sank in the mud and disappeared. (Just kidding, sort of.)

* Kingdom Beer is making a go of it.

* Overland border crossings evolved a little. Poipet immigration seems to have cleaned up it's act. If you can fight your way through the army of visa and money exchange scammers on the Thai side and get to Cambodian immigration, you can get a Cambodian tourist visa for about the right price - $20. The crossing at Koh Kong remains the same, steeped in its overcharging ways. And Prek Chak on the VN border seems to have picked up some of the same habits.

* Police are actually enforcing the helmet laws for motorcyclists and occasionally a smattering of other traffic laws as well. Most people even obey the traffic signals these days, at least during the day. Times change.

* Tourist arrivals are up, though the demographics have changed some. Roads continue to improve. Seems to be lots of small infrastructure projects underway or imminent around the country. Investment, especially Chinese investment, is way up. GDP is up. The country is, in many ways, moving forward.

* The Cambodian riel lost a bit against the dollar but gained it back by years end - settling in around the old standard of 4000R to the dollar. Petrol isn't cheap (US$1-$1.20/liter) but cigarettes and beer still are. A buck for a pack of Marlboros, less for local cigarettes. Can even buy them one at a time. There's still no closing time at the bars...

A passing encounter

Bangkok. Out of the hospital with a clean bill and no required follow-ups. Not quite what I was but a helluva lot better than I could have been. I'm done with them and almost home.

Feeling tired and weak and a bit beaten up by the doctors, but nevertheless past it, I decided to make a night out, recoup some strength, if in attitude only. I began at a Soi 4 bar, perchance talking to an old (35ish) Thai taxi girl with whom I had one of the most disturbing conversations I've had.

I think she was trying to talk me up, hoping that I'd become a customer, but she spewed so much hatred, such unrelenting bile for everybody and every kind of person, that she literally made me feel physically ill. Any other time I would have been able to take it in stride, perhaps knock her down a few pegs, but my weakened state left me vulnerable.

One of the reasons I went to the bar was to try to relax and buck up a bit, put on a light, listen to some music, watch some people, get into a better frame. I just wasn't ready for her. Not that she directed any of her venom at me - after all, I was a potential customer. But no-one else was spared.

She began when I entered, harshly forcing some other (younger, prettier) taxi girls to relinquish their choice streetside seats to me, referring to them as "buffaloes." Granted, as a paying customer I was entitled to the seat, but I wouldn't have asked them to move, taxi girls or not.

I sat down.

She plopped down next to me and immediately began about the 'half-brained idiot farang bar owner' who lets these "useless buffaloes" do what they want. She went on…and on.

Trying to change the subject to something completely different, I asked about a katoey fortune teller that used to sit on the sidewak in front of the Dynasty Inn a few doors down. A deck of cards, a candle and a kerchief on the pavement - he was there for many years and I noticed in my last couple of visits that he had disappeared. I thought maybe he had moved. To be honest, I have no particular sympathy for katoeys and probably even something of a prejudice against them, but would never dream of wishing harm on somebody who had done me no harm. And this particular guy (girl) had always been kind to me. He spoke decent English and turned the cards and told my fortune a couple-few times over the years, doing a pretty good job of it. Anyway, when I asked about him she told me bluntly and with something of a smirk that he was dead - "dead of AIDS," she enunciated.

I felt an immediate rush of sadness. I knew this guy, or at least who he was. She went on to revel in it a bit, telling me how he deserved it because he was a katoey, how all katoeys deserve it, "butt-fuckers" that they are. I pressed for more info, received little, and in hindsight, I'm not sure she was telling the truth anyway. It may have all have been an exercise in wishful thinking.

She then went on to attack, in turn, the stupid Khmer beggars, the job-stealing Burmese, the thieving Vietnamese children who sell flowers on the street and, of course, the "smelly Muslims" that inhabit Soi 3. With a big smile she used my almost empty beer bottle to demonstrate how she would crack the skull of an 8-year-old Vietnamese 'match-girl' who was working the street nearby. And even though I went from a polite smile, to defending these people, to a blank stare, to a disgusted stare and finally quite obviously just looking away trying to ignore her, I don't think she ever got the idea that I was anything but enjoying her vile banter. I guess I should have just laid into her, but really wasn't up for a fight. That's not why I was there.

In the end, after only two beers, I called for my bill, paid the exact amount, and left. As I was leaving she followed, proffering the standard lilting "where are you going?" and a sweet voiced "come again," probably hoping for a tip or an offer to have her join me, but I wouldn't/couldn't even look at her.

I went on to better places and better people and made a pretty good night of it.

I have no moral to this story or conclusion to offer, just a vaguely sick feeling from the encounter, slowly fading as the hangover wanes and my strength returns.

Southeast Asia Backpacker's Credo and Motto

The Credo
1. I shall eschew the ways of the tourist and have an authentic Asian experience rather than a shallow, contrived, package holiday. I am Traveler.

2. I shall wear the largest possible backpack to bear proud witness of my creed.
3. I will spend my travels on the quest for Our Holy Grail - for the ‘Unspoiled Place’ - a place undiscovered by tourists, where happy, welcoming, generous natives tend vast fields of ganja along a deserted, previously unknown tropical beach, and that has Internet access.
4. I shall begin my quest on Khao San Road.
5. I shall not leave Khao San Road without a Lonely Planet guide.
6. I shall never admit to using a Lonely Planet guide.
7. I shall follow ‘Wheeler’s Way’, a mystical school of thought, which both eschews and embraces Khao San Road – a way of finding the Unspoiled Place without ever leaving the path.

(Editors note: ‘Wheeler’s Way’ is a school of thought posited as a possible answer to the decades old conundrum known as the ‘Sang Thip Paradox’: If it is in Lonely Planet then I can find it, but it won’t be the Unspoiled Place. If it is not in Lonely Planet, it might be the Unspoiled Place, but I won’t be able to find it.)

8. I shall wear the traditional international backpacker’s uniform and don at least one piece of local clothing (conical hat, krama, yam, etc.) to show my oneness with the Asian people.
9. I shall not clean the local soils and aromas from my uniform for I wish to always carry a piece of where I have been.
10. I shall never wear a souvenir tee shirt in the tee-shirt’s country of origin.
11. I shall eat banana pancakes on a regular basis, for it is the quintessential Asian food.
12. I shall eat in the cheapest restaurants. Hygiene is for package tourists.
13. I shall travel by the least comfortable means, for comfort is also for package tourists.
14. I shall drink the local beer, for I shall always endeavor to be in tune with the local culture. And because it is the cheapest.
15. I shall stay in the cheapest guesthouse. More money for beer.
16. I shall not allocate more that 75% of my daily budget to alcohol and drugs. Moderation in all things.
17. I shall make a pilgrimage to a Full Moon Party at Had Rin Beach Koh Phangan at least once in my life. For it is Mecca.
18. I shall revel in food and mosquito-borne diseases, for these are the badges of the true Asian Traveler.
19. I shall not leave Thailand without having my hair colored, dreaded, corn-rolled or shaved off.
20. I shall model my travels on “On the Road” by Jack Kerouac
21. I shall read “The Beach” before entering Thailand so that I understand the goal of quest.
22. I shall read “Off the Rails in Phnom Penh” before entering Cambodia so that I understand the dangers of the quest.
23. I shall read “The Quite American” while travelling through Vietnam because everybody else is.
24. And this above all: I shall bargain without mercy and hone my skills to a sharp edge, so that I can proudly proclaim our sacred motto:

“I get it for less than the locals”

The Mantra
In times of trial and doubt – as I lose all feeling in my legs in the 14th hour of a local bus ride…when I can’t sleep for the noise of a thousand rats scurrying through my $2 room…as vomit and diarrhea spew simultaneously from my salmonella saturated body – I will repeat this mantra unto myself…

I am not a tourist
I am not a tourist
I am not a tourist
I am not a tourist
I am not a tourist
I am not a tourist

…until the doubt passes and I am ready for more authentic Asian experiences.


(I originally published this several years back. A couple of the references are a bit dated, but otherwise it seems to be holding up pretty well. Yes, I know, backpackers are an easy mark and perhaps picked on a bit too much, but having visited Khao Sarn Road today, I  just can't help myself. And it is, after all, the season to be jolly.) 

Blame the West

Western fast food fuelling SE Asia diabetes boom*

(AFP) SYDNEY — The growing popularity of Western junk food is fuelling a diabetes boom across Southeast Asia, Australian researchers warned on Wednesday.


Studies found about 11 percent of men and 12 percent of women in Vietnam's Ho Chi Minh City had type 2 diabetes without knowing it, on top of the four percent of people who are diagnosed sufferers.


"Dietary patterns have been changing dramatically in Vietnam in recent years, particularly in the cities as they become more Westernised," said Tuan Nguyen of Sydney's Garvan Institute of Medical Research.

"There are fast food outlets everywhere..."

I don't buy it.

More specifically, I believe that there is a lot of Type 2 diabetes in Vietnam (and across Southeast Asia.) But I don't believe that a few dozen KFCs and the bit of other western fast foods available are a significant factor.

The standard day to day diet in places like Vietnam, Cambodia and Thailand, while often delicious, is horribly unhealthy and highly conducive to inducing various health problems - very heavy on carbohydrates (rice, rice and more rice,) lots of meats, fats and offal, limited vegetables, most everything stir fried in oil, sugar added to almost all stir-fries and soups and msg in the cooking. And on top of that, given the opportunity, a very sedentary lifestyle. The Southeast Asian diet and life-style is a virtual formula for Type 2 diabetes (and hypertension and high cholesterol,) led by the daily consumption of copious quantities of  white rice. White rice (or rice noodles) is eaten with virtually every meal.

The prevalence of rice in the diet has even made its mark in colloquial language where the verb 'to eat' has become synonymous with the phrase 'eat rice' (e.g. ăn cơm in Vietnamese, ngum bye in Khmer.) You've not eaten until you've eaten rice. And it's not just a few tablespoons of rice with meals, but mounds of it. Most of it jasmine rice, which carries the highest glycemic load of all the various sorts of white rices. Eating white rice, especially jasmine rice, has been likened (with only some exaggeration) to eating straight sugar.

The limited availability of a few western fast foods outlets in some urban areas is like pissing in the rain when it comes to adding diabetes inducing items to the local diet.

If there has been an actual increase in Type 2 diabetes in Vietnam and other mainland Southeast Asia countries, (as opposed to an research artifact, i.e. formerly undiagnosed cases now being diagnosed,) I suspect it is due to increased affluence in the region allowing Southeast Asians to engage more fully in the dreadfully unhealthy local diet and lifestyle - more meat, better rice, more leisure time. Some people would like to characterize Type 2 diabetes as a "Western lifestyle disease." In Southeast Asia it is not a Western lifestyle disease. It is not born of KFCs and Twinkies. It is a Southeast Asian lifestyle disease. 

* Photo by AFP

A Field Guide to the Tourists of Southeast Asia

Touristus Touristus
The Fat Bottomed Watcherbird, a.k.a. the Tourist: (Touristus Touristus)
A plump, colorful, non-intrusive species known for its varied yet strict migratory patterns and strong tendency to stick close to the flock. Though the Touristus Touristus migrates to a different destination in each of its annual forays from its native nesting grounds, it does so only briefly, rarely for more than a three week period, and only as part of a flock, usually consisting of 15 to 30 Watcherbirds, which remain grouped tightly together for the duration. Interestingly, upon returning to their native nesting grounds, these flocks disperse, never to see their flock-mates again. Aside from their distinctive flocking habits the Touristus Touristus is most easily identified by its clean, bright plumage, a fat wallet and its appearance exclusively in well-established roosting areas. Though not a gregarious species, often treating the locals with noisy disdain, the Touristus Touristus is nevertheless a highly prized species at its migratory destinations due to its habit of defecating money when pleased. The Fat Bottomed Watcherbird is ordinarily welcomed and treated with great care by the locals who often go to extraordinary lengths to entice or even trick it into roosting at their location.

Touristus Denialus (alt: Touristus Touristus Denialus)
The Lesser Fat Bottomed Watcherbird, a.k.a. the Traveler: (Touristus Denialus)
Often indistinguishable from the Touristus Touristus, so much so that some experts have concluded the Touristus Denialus not to be a separate species but a mere sub-species of the Touristus Touristus (i.e. Touristus Touristus Denialus.) This species has a similar appearance, tends to travel to the same destinations and stays about as long at each destination as the Touristus Touristus. Nevertheless there are some distinguishing features. Unlike the Touristus Touristus, the Touristus Denialus tends to move in much smaller groups, sometimes only in pairs or individually and is much more likely to be observed away from the well-established roosting grounds. Comparatively speaking, their plumage is not as bright and their wallet is not as fat as the Touristus Touristus and they rarely defecate money. Most distinctively, when in the presence of a flock of Touristus Touristus, the Touristus Denialus will cling together and sing 'Notmeeeeee, Notmeeeeee, Notmeeeee' repeatedly. They are known to continue to mutter the 'Notmeeee' call amongst themselves for hours after the Touristus Touristus has departed. Though generally welcomed by locals at their migratory destinations, they are not considered a particularly desirable species and are largely ignored. The female of the species is especially vulnerable to exploitation by the locals and is often hunted by local beggars, children and volunteer organizations for her cache of funds.

Touristus Vulgaris
The Dirty Plumed Tit, a.k.a. the Backpacker: (Touristus Vulgaris)
A cliquey, communal, migratory, low-end species with a permanently engorged backpack, a tight money-belt and a haughty attitude about any species outside of the clique. Considered a pest species in many countries, particularly in Asia. They tend to travel in pairs or small groups along well-trodden routes and roost for extended periods in great raucous flocks that can take over entire islands or sections of cities. They are in a constant state of shedding plastic bottles. They thrive on a diet of beer and whatever is cheapest though they do require regular feedings of banana pancakes to maintain health. Due to their docile and naive nature they are occasionally baited, trapped and consumed by the locals. The Dirty Plumed Tit displays chameleonesque qualities, sporting a tousled plumage which vaguely mimics both the local inhabitants and the now extinct Touristus Hippius (i.e. the Hippie.) Their migratory cycle is determined by the complex interplay of the monsoons and the school year and their primary migratory patterns follow those of the extinct Hippies, though most of the roosting grounds along the traditional migratory routes have been environmentally and culturally decimated, largely due to the adaptive success of Touristus Vulgaris.

Touristus Phallicus
The Dogbird, a.k.a. the Sex Tourist: (Touristus Phallicus)
A rogue migratory species, usually traveling individually, often welcomed by the locals at its migratory destinations, but shunned by other members of the Touristus family. As the name suggests, this species displays great sexual disparity with over 90% of the observed specimens being male. The stereotypical Dogbird is rotund and sometimes pear-shaped, usually a middle-aged male, sporting bright flowery plumage and Faginesque facial features. But in fact Dogbirds are multi-varied in appearance and age and are more accurately identified by behavior and migratory patterns. This species migrates the year round, but to a much more limited range of destinations than other members of the Touristus family, including Southeast Asia, the Philippines, India and Sri Lanka, Russia and Costa Rica. Females of the species frequent different destinations. Also dissimilar to other species of Touristus which tend to engage in a variety of behavioral activities, the Touristus Phallicus generally shows little interest in local culture and engages in a much more limited range of behaviors, focusing primarily on non-productive mating behaviors with the locals. The Touristus Phallicus is considered an exploitative species by many experts, similar to the Catbird which lays its eggs in the nests of other species. But the Touristus Phallicus is exploited by the locals as well, often falling prey to its own narrow range of behaviors. Properly manipulated, some have been known to disgorge their entire fortune to a local bird less than half its age.